But again - the one I love best was "Most people don't tell about these types of happenings in their family .... or the kids don't get caught. Don't make Jane feel like a criminal .... just tell her that you are disappointed but know that she wont do it again ... and expect better honesty of her .... then bury it ..... that's all I can say ... cheer up .... life goes on "
Of course - trouble is - it's a bit late. I already did my absolute best to make Jane feel like a criminal. But it certainly helps me to lessen my anger at Jane and to once again feel like a mother who just wants the best for her children - and their happiness.
I will take Jane to lunch soon and send her some money. I didn't mention that directly after the court hearing Jane and I went to lunch. (Or did I?) But yes - that is what I did. I was so hungry and I didn't feel like a sandwich or whatever so instead we went to lunch as I chastised her to remind her I wasn't taking her to lunch for her actions.
I really suck at the discipline stuff.
Daughter No 2 came home Friday morning. Anna (17 in a month) wanted to attend a friends birthday party on Saturday night and conned me a little with an expression of her desire to have quality time with me. I could see she wanted to join her friends on Friday evening and gave my .. permission? That isnt the right word she is old enough to make her own way now. Blessing? Thats too odd and way to religious sounding for me to be able to stomach. Well - I could see she wanted to go and I was actually bored of almost 17 year old beautiful teen talk after an hour or so... so it was fine that she could go.
Awful pattern here - although I whinge about her going out and partying all the time and neglecting her studies etc... I also understand it a little. And indulge her a lot. Made sure she had what she needed to be safe and also socially acceptable within her crowd.. and waited until midnight when she texted me to tell me from her friend Madison's phone to tell me she was sleeping over. Arghhhhhhhh. Found sleep sometime after 1 am I guess. She arrived home at 10 am somewhat sick and tired. I made her come grocery shopping with me.
Yesterday we celebrated the 53rd birthday of a work colleague and friend of mine at a restaurant with another friend and my daughter Anna. A leisurely enjoyable lunch. Many giggles, lovely food and wonderful company.
I probably shouldnt mention my friends age - but the fact is Dinh is from Vietnam and has never had children. And no one would guess her age over 33. It would be easier if I hadnt grown to love this woman. Then I could hate her for being so incredibly beautiful, elegant and not just admire her for her incredible achievements.
I had a couple of glasses of wine with lunch and came home wonderfully mellow - and napped whilst MOTH fixed.. something he said was broken on.. the boat or the trailer. Anna could not nap because he was using.. a power tool that is noisy but I had no trouble. When I woke Anna was ready to attend her party and MOTH was in the shower getting ready for us to visit our friends to plan today.
Dunno that we did a terrible lot of planning though! We just enjoyed their company for a few hours and came home.
Today MOTH left early to secure the better BBQ spot out at Awoonga whilst Anna and I slept in to arrive at 9 am at the dam. I got up around 7.45 am and packed food, utensils, tablecloths etc for the day and woke Anna as late as I felt I could. I didnt look at the clock when she arrived home last night - I just remember being pleased she was home.
We picked up two of Anna's longtime friends and went to the dam to enjoy our friends, the water, the boat and... well just the outdoors.
The girls lounge around the BBQ area. That is Courtney with her back to us, then clockwise Anna and Madison and in the hammock behind Madison is Laura.
Our boat and the tube... and our friends awaiting their turn while I wait at the BBQ area.
Our mess - and yet another day that was wonderful. Good friends and good times. Driving a very old boat with a little tiny 18hp motor around having fun...
Courtney was my daughter Jane's collaborator in the shoplifting... err stuff. At first today, she was horrified she had to spend it with all of us. But at the end of the day - she was a ski tube hog as best we can be!
Anna and her friends were quite disturbingly interested in the birth of Nicole Riche and Christina's babys! They furiously texted for more information disgusted they were away from technology to find out more! I thought at first as they shouted at each other that Nicole and Christina must of been friends of theirs! When I realised who they were talking about... I had to remind myself to shush.
My daughter Anna's move to her fathers is looking promising. He doesn't allow her to go out at night and he is promising her the world. She cooks dinner every night and helps with his business. She doesn't swear around him and he is promising to buy her a new car. He is enticing her with.. many promises. He loves having her so much that she knows she would break his heart if she ditched this deal now. And - it could all work out fine. She can.. have both worlds if she plays her hand right.
I like her company. And I miss her. But even today - we get home at 4pm and I go to work to do what I have to - and I get home and I have to clean everything from today and put it all away and cook dinner... and my little princess sleeps. It is madness I should be expected to provide a day out for not even a thank you and no help.
But that is simply motherhood. I love all my children. No matter how much crap they deal me with. No matter how many times they shock, disappoint or humiliate me.
MOTH has been quite sick since we got home. Vomiting and... well I kinda paid attention. I ate everything he ate and I feel fine. Hope he is alright. I have gone in every so often... and made sure my lovely new sheets are still clean. Gave him water, a towel, a bucket and said.. "Oh heck don't tell me please".
And our camping gear is kinda packed up and ready for our next big adventure at Baffle creek in two weeks time.
4 comments:
> Well - I could see she wanted to go and I was actually bored of almost 17 year old beautiful teen talk after an hour or so... so it was fine that she could go.<
This made me laugh...do your kids read this?
New reader. Just want to say "hello".
You could add an disposable (i.e. not your main one) email address for people that want to contact you off blog.
I recently suffered a horrible amount of racist and sexist abuse - finding good people like you in the blogosphere reminded me that even in the darkness there is light
Elsewhere - I think Sara (22) reads this ... she suddenly calls shocked at some things I may discuss/bleed here. The other kids - I doubt it. Maybe.
I never mean things to sound so horrid - but Anna (almost 17) thinks Nicole Ritchie and Christina .. hard last name to spell - having a baby at the same hospital on the same day is very important.
On Friday night when I told her to just go out and provided the money... was because an hour of her telling me crap about her important girlfriends and their boyfriends and parties.. and parents who are cool and do indulge and dont whinge and how Daddy has SO MUCH MONEY and hairstyles and fashions and ... well I just got tired and wanted... to be alone. Around midnight of course I completely forget that.. and just absolutely fret she is not home.
Stupid really. (On my part) But I do - suddenly the boogy man could be trying to harm my precious daughter who thinks dressing seductively is ok... Suddenly I worry about.. really mad things.
I kinda like just sitting with my dogs. Knowing the bitch is desexed and that the dog has to climb an eight foot fence to get out is somewhat easier? And they are always interested in what I have to say. Honestly. The fact I could be holding chocolate has nothing to do with anything.
marta saenz G'day and welcome. My apologies my last posts have been nothing but whinging!
I did add the email thing.
I know nothing about everything.. cant stand racism or sexism and simply like nice things in life. I am not awfully good at religion but I can respect anyone elses. I dont think I am particularly good... I would like to be. Sometimes I think things I so wish I wouldnt.
Thats the thing that attracts us to blogging.. our online diary that tells the truth.. but so many stories have to be left out.
I was never sexually abused really -if you dont count minor childhood stuff and really lousy choices in lovers.
>I was never sexually abused really -if you dont count minor childhood stuff and really lousy choices in lovers.<
That's really funny phrasing too. You've definitely got something...I'm sure lots of mothers of teenagers could identify with what you're saying.
And your life is a tragi-comedy!
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