All good things must come to an end

I have always liked these hours of the night when my family are all asleep and I am alone. Ok - so my dogs are snoring at my feet. I am not so alone.

I want to share a few more photos of the party. This is William and Billy and what mothers do when there is left over strawberry whipped cream in a can.


Just SHUSH I said!

This is Anna's photo of some of her presents. Some are omitted - a lovely pillow from M - because someone spilt something on it and it was being rescued in the laundry. The jewellery was on a hanger she stole from me... and not added to her photo.

This is Jane, Jay, William and Sara's boyfriend playing at the pool. Before the party. Before Jane's little "mishap".
This is one of Jack and Anna and THAT bottle of tequila... that never seemed to get emptied. Me in the background pondering what button I have pressed wrong on the camera again. The little kids hanging around and making themselves... hmm I dunno... just being wonderful.


I asked Anna Sunday at brunch if the party was any good. She told me she would not know until Monday at school. I was FURIOUS! How could she not know until Monday. But.. she wanted confirmation from her peers before she could tell me it was OK. I suspect I have done something wrong there. She should be confident enough to know herself.

But... 24 hours later she reports it was an OK party. We didn't shame her with our somewhat humble.. abode etc.I am so GLAD!

Sara flys home to Sydney tomorrow. Jay will be so pleased.. he has missed school and is just bored without it. He didn't let me read to him. And I feel like I can't push the issue.. I see him so little - it isn't the same? Sara and her boyfriend wanted to rest.. so I let them sleep in etc.. and Jay was bored to death with me - especially on days I had committed to other things. When I would tell Jay he had to come with me while his Mum slept.. he would do it.. but he was visibly anxious and I felt it easier to just let him.. be at home with his sleeping parents. The satellite tv kept him amused.

I loved the pictures in my mind - the ones I should of taken and knew I should of taken. Of my kids sitting with me and laughing at silly things. Of how naughty my girls are - and delightfully FUNNY. But - it is all over. Tomorrow a drive to Rockhampton and Sara goes home.

I didn't have to "bite my tongue" over any of my daughters actions. Whilst I love the way Sara's paramour seems to make Sara happy - and has some good actions and intentions towards my grandson... I worry about little things. I try to tell myself it is hard to amuse yourself in a new town when you don't have a drivers license but I also know that is utter bullshit. I am also confident she can handle whatever she wants to handle. Sara wont buy any kid $50 bottles of Baileys. (Sara wouldn't be so stupid as to buy kids alcohol)

My dream of Sara and Jay moving here is simply never going to happen. And .. I guess I have dealt with that. Whilst she is one of us for sure... she is also part of another life.

She is an intelligent, loyal (not to me! and that is also ok) and beautiful girl. I wish she had of decided she needed this break when I was working and wasnt so financially challenged. She insisted on washing up almost every night. And I relate it to something private she wrote that I read and lost my temper over... wherein she felt I treated them as slaves with washing up and I carelessly made a comment about her thinking her nails more important. She bossed me around back this time and made sure she did it. And I felt terrible. I am going to stop my bullshit and buy a dishwasher now.

I still feel I dont want or need a dishwasher.

It is only two years away Anna will most likely move away to create her own life. It is time I started getting ready for this.

It is simply scarey. So long looking after them. The good the bad and the absolutely terrible and revolting. It is simply late at night and finally quiet... and I hate the fact I wont see Sara or her son for .. a long time.