Mud in your eye?

I have a sty under my eye. A very large pimple like thing... under my eye. I knew it was coming ... but it is annoying now. I could have the flu coming but I am combating that with mad healthy eating and resting.

The sty - almost came in very handy. At work we were told we had to attend a staff meeting.. and suddenly the sty was a stroke of luck. I lamented to all staff I had contact with that I had a terribly sty under my eye that was causing me a dreadful headache. It was actually just annoying me and making me look rediculously ugly...
Almost handy - because the staff meeting was cancelled. Thank dog. Why we have to have them out of hours when we are not paid is beyond me.
I adopted a somewhat dramatic - oh dear - my eye... stance just so I had an excuse on why I didnt attend. I wonder if I could FAKE a sty next time?
I am rundown. That is why I get the silly stys. I know that. I was somewhat surprised when my mother told me... "Of course your run down - you dont like change and that makes you rundown." Oh. Just a rediculous ... "oh".

It is odd with my girls not being here. (Especially Anna - Jane has been at boarding school for sometime before the past 8 months so I am used to just the teenage girl turmoltuos stuff at school holiday time)
The clean bedrooms (not including William's "tornado look" which I am sure is all the rage... somewhere) and less work - still seem somewhat confronting to me. I get confused in the laundry when there is none. I dont seem to remember to cook for just three people. (The dogs are not unhappy with this part of the scenerio) We all stare at the telephone when it rings and wait for one of the girls to answer it... and we all look surprised when the telephone rings out.
"Maybe we should of answered that?" and we all look at each other accusingly. "Nah!" we all decide. Normally the girls would push us over to answer the telephone.

Monday we get all new kids at work. 21 brand new almost two year olds. The odd part is.. I didnt like accepting the children I have had for this past eight months.. are moving up. I know most of them are ready and just so eager and willing to learn different things. I am just that selfish.. that I didnt want to and dont want to let them go. I like waking up looking forward to playing with them. I like their laughter, their tantrums and their ability to learn. Hunting for lizards, spiders, frogs and bugs. Stick insects stuck on our clothing - and vying to be the one who has the bug on us? Touching jelly, dough, spaghetti and paint. Roaring laughing at hot and cold play... hiding behind my back as I call them and mock that I have lost them and then screaming when they jump into my view...
These new 21 kids have awful big shoes to fill. Well - awful small shoes really. (three of the 21 I have had for a couple of months and I know they are amazing so that is a plus)
I really worry... what if I dont like these kids like I loved the last batch? I worry that the two batches I have had... where simply amazing due to luck.. and soon horrid kids will come and that could make me love the job less... worse make me... soured at it? Oh dog let these kids be as wonderful as the last ones.
Let them be funny, and compassionate and caring and like to see nature. Let them be angry and sick and tired and FEEL so freely and let them let me be part of their days. Their little hands around mine and tears on my neck. The triumph when they get colours, shapes and animal names correct - let me feel that too. The understanding when we agreed shades of blue/purple/pink etc could be too close for just one guess.
I hope the new kids will be good at the hokey pokey. I hope they will all complain to me when I get it wrong. I hope they will be fussy about the jocks or knickers they have to wear. I hope they will all copy me when I say "oh dear oh dear" and I hope they will all say "he/she is being UNHELPFUL".... when whoever said that is probably being damn unhelpful themselves.
I hope their next room carers.. love them as much as I love them. And I hope I dont miss them too much.
My daughter Jane sent a very uplifting positive email to her sister today. Sara forwarded it to me in confidence and I mistakenly showed it to her other sister Anna... not calculating the fact that Anna and Jane were at a net cafe using the internet... and therefore I betrayed the confidences. Of course Jane would be completely oblivious that she betrays Anna's confidences all the time - often with pure spite....like the time she ran to tell me Anna had had sexual relations...or telling her father that Anna likes to party and drink alcohol with her friends....
Poor Sara of course felt dreadful that Jane found her accidental betrayal? and telephoned me to berate me for it. I am getting so awful I just find it so nice to hear my daughters voices that I dont mind being introuble.
William signed on again for soccer today. I paid the fees - bought new socks etc... and we went to lunch at the chinese restuarant together. I was surprised to find Will and I have never "had lunch" before. Not just the two of us. Other than at home or feeding the ducks at the park etc. His manners where lovely and I was really pleased. He commented that I only "had lunch" with his sisters. And that is really silly of me.. because he is a lovely lunch companion.